Absurdity Rules?

On the back of continuing postal disruption comes the threat of industrial action on British Airways. More will undoubtedly follow, undoubtedly. Commentators are right: Is this 2009 or 1979? Amidst all the economic doom and gloom, rising industrial action and political paralysis, everything certainly seems to be going back to the future at present - albeit without Michael J. Fox and a Delorean.

Many are hoping that the forthcoming Christmas season will see a return of consumer confidence and the beginnings of recovery. My bet’s still on Q3 of next year for the latter, but hey – I and others would be delighted to see a bit of premature recuperation!

That said, if we’re meant to be shopping our way out of recession, maybe Westminster is missing the ultimate sales pop. The United States owes China around US$772 billion, so maybe we should be upping the sovereignty-endangering ante and offering Beijing some sort of lease-back arrangement. A bit like Hong Kong, only in reverse: a 100-year lease over the entire UK, say, for £5 trillion. Cash.

That would work out to about £81,000 per person. Invested wisely, that could work out quite nicely for us Brits. Plus Boris could learn Chinese, the Queen could install a pagoda in front of Buckingham Palace and certain polies could give free reign to their Tiananmen-admiring tendencies and crush union dissent once and for all.

I mean, in a week that’s seen Nick Griffin spouting bollocks on Question Time and Sterling dipping ever-further in value, absurdity rules and anything seems possible.

And not a lot of it good, alas.